


12x12!coda

by AmandaPandapple



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 12x12, Destiel - Freeform, Drabble, Holding Hands, M/M, what if dean held cas's hand in the back seat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-10-11 12:44:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10465329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmandaPandapple/pseuds/AmandaPandapple
Summary: Based off ofthis post.





	

Dean almost lost Cas, again. Each time seemed to bring him closer and closer to heart failure. Even when it was Dean’s hands about to kill Cas-

Dean doesn’t like to think about those times. Especially now, when Cas sits next to him, alive and well.

Dean still feels that panic. He can’t seem to shake it, even now in the comfort of his car with his family still alive, he can’t shake seeing Cas like how he was. How he was bloody and cracking. Dean winces, closing his eyes from remembering Cas’s wet eyes and quivering chin.

Dean looks over at Cas, feeling nauseous because his clothes were still all bloody. He could even see black stains from the black ooze that came from Cas’s mouth. He really didn’t need to think back to the Leviathans right now.

Dean reached across the small space between them, a little hesitant, but determined in placing his hand on top of Castiel’s. He didn’t take his eyes away from Cas. He need the angel to know what this meant. It wasn’t some accident, or an intention of friendliness of some kind. He needed Cas to know the extent of his care.

Cas looked over at him a little wide eyed, and a bit confused. Dean could almost see worry in his eyes, but Dean kept his face the same, which he’s sure read the sick concerning anxiety he’d been feeling for hours now.

He couldn’t say what he wanted; not with all this company. He would wait for them to be alone, but the bunker was still some time away, and he needed to say these things now. So, as he gripped Cas’s hand and looked away back out his window a little scared, he prayed.

 _‘Hey, Cas, I’m praying to you for this. What I need to say can’t wait. We can talk about it later, but I just need you to know that I love you too.’_ Dean hesitated in his prayer a moment, as Cas turned his hand around so they were palm to palm, and Dean instinctively laced their fingers together, _‘You mean too much to me, Cas.’_

Dean could still feel Cas’s eyes on him, but he wasn’t brave enough to look over at him again. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if he did. His mother and brother were still in the car, and it would be inappropriate, but when they finally got to the bunker, and Sam and Mary went inside, Dean didn’t hesitate a second to pull Cas into a hug.

He held on as tight as he could, even if it was a little too hard; Cas’s angel strength could take it.

“I love you, Cas.” He repeated, out loud, and kept repeating it softly, almost as a comfort to himself. He loved this angel in his warm embrace, and he hated how long it took him to finally say it out loud. Even more so to mean it more than just brotherly.


End file.
